Java? You’ll be doing Cobol.

Meh, there isn’t even a fossil Barbie.

There’s Encrypted Client Hello, supported by major browsers that does the SNI encryption. It’s starting to be fairly widely supported.

Lord of the Trackers!

Well people diss Hetzner too, but I haven’t really had any issues with them either. So maybe reputations aren’t always something to go by.

What’s this warning thing? (for those of us far outside of the Apple ecosphere)

Cool, I’ve always wanted to get back into Perl.

Ionos used to be 1&1 which had a fairly poor reputation. Not sure what it’s become nowadays. Apparently they haven’t gotten much better.

Who’s a good boy?

We’ll just train an AI from his mailing list posts and continue as usual.

Oh, that CloudBox…

Just turn the case around. Problem solved.

They need 4 D cell batteries, so big power levels.

My menus need to be dynamically reloaded!

It’s still Javascript.

You don’t, it’s just more convenient. And according to the windows people, it’s the same thing there (except fewer people know how to use the terminal because it’s so arcane).

Ok, but all your dialogue will be spoken backwards.

The problem is that apart from a handful of geeks (a lot of which tend to gather on sites like this one), nobody is interested in computers. Which admittedly has consequences since computers are definitely interested in them. But then getting people interested in anything nowadays isn’t very easy.

They also did that stuff with DR-DOS, they’ve been pulling dirty tricks with all their competition since the beginning with little or no consequences.

And people whine because their laptops sometimes don’t work with Linux when it’s actually a fucking miracle that almost all machines currently work flawlessly despite all the hardware having been specifically designed to be hostile to anything that isn’t Windows.

I know, back then people knew what files and directories were. Good times.